God's masterpiece- look in the mirror!

Ok ladies, let's talk about our bodies.
I was lying in my bed earlier, thinking about life and what it has in store for me. I realized that if God gave me the chance to instantly change anything I wanted about my body, I wouldn't take it. This isn't because I believe I look like a model or am flawless by any means. I have 3 main reasons for this train of thought.

God doesn't make mistakes.

If we truly believe God to be a perfect, all-knowing God, why do we doubt Him so often? If we truly believe God to be our loving father and guide, why would we believe He would give us a worthless body? God doesn't make mistakes. He wouldn't give you just any body- He made that body *specifically* for you. Your spirit lives in that body- and that is no mistake. In the Book of Mathew, God says: "Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?" (Matthew 7:9-11) God is our God, but first He is our father. And what loving father would give their child a worthless, ugly gift?

It wouldn't change anything. 

Have you ever thought about what happens to addicts after they die? People addicted to Alcohol, Meth, Pornography, Coffee, Sugar, Talk Shows-- anything. It is less of what happens to them, and more of what doesn't happen to them. Many (arguably most) addictions are mental as well as they are physical. So it would make sense that after they die, they would still have those cravings and suffer from withdrawals because of their inability to satisfy them. It is the same thing with changing our bodies in unnatural ways. After you get those implants or tighten those wrinkles, the craving and desire never goes away. And since your body is a fixed mass of atoms, you can only change so much. What do you do when you can't do anything else? It is a never ending cycle that will only end in self-hate and depression. No matter how much you change, you will never be happy with who you are until you learn to love yourself as you are. 

We would never learn.

A few summers ago, I had a terrible realization. I tried on my swimsuit and looked down to find the black plague of all flaws-- stretch marks striped across my thighs. This was of course a grave milestone for me. It was the thing that brought me face to face with something that I had been avoiding for years-  I was growing up. At first I looked for quick fixes-- creams and lotions that promised to erase the marks. I then accepted the belief that the only way to rid myself of this curse was to lose any fat in that area, so my skin could shrink back to it's original size. After months of negative thoughts and self-consciousness, I finally concluded that I would just have to live the rest of my life being ugly and undesirable. 

This of course is something we have all experienced. The helplessness of being unable to change the undesirable parts of ourselves, and giving into the lies of the devil that whisper "hate". But if you remember, God never teaches us to hate. No others, not ourselves. What does He teach? "..Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these." (Mark 12;31) He does not say "love thy neighbour, but hate yourself all you want." We must love all equally- ourselves included. 

If we were to instantly change ourselves every time something is undesirable or different than we believe it should be, we would never have a chance to learn to love ourselves as we are. We would constantly be chasing an imaginary ideal, only to find ourselves completely lost.  God is an artist, and you are His masterpiece. Why change that? There is no ideal body- if you look throughout history this is evident. Beauty standards change even decade to decade! 

Surround yourself with people who love you the way God loves you. Don't let negative thoughts hold you back from being confident in your own skin. Your body is a precious gift from God, and no beauty standard can change that. 

Sticks and Stones: Why we need to stop babying ourselves

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me."

You have heard this before, I guarantee it. Most people focus on the last part, using it to teach about the power of words (words do hurt you, but that is a story for another time). But today  I want to focus on something people don't usually address- the sticks and stones. Have you ever thought about what they actually are? Why is it that we let the sticks and stones hurt us in the first place? I am going to take the liberty of explaining what I think on the subject.

What are sticks and stones?

Imagine a stone hurtling towards you at who-knows-how-many-miles-an-hour. Imagine the fear, panic, and confusion you would feel. This stone would most likely be falling from a high ledge or thrown from the hand of someone else, with possible but not guaranteed ill intent. Imagine attempting to cover your face from the anticipated impact and pain, only to find it hurt your hands just as much as your face.
Can you think of anything else that may entice the same reaction? Our bodies have a natural protective system wired into our very makeup. We are subconsciously on guard, constantly protecting our vital parts and pieces. Though, this is in far more ways than physical.
I'd like you to imagine the stone again. But instead of seeing a fist-sized piece of conglomerate minerals, I want you to see your hardest trial. Something big, uncontrollable, dangerous. Something you probably didn't chose, something that either the world, people around you, or your own biological or chemical makeup is inflicting upon you. Something that may or may not be out of anger, hurt, or lust. Something that gives you those sore neck muscles and tear-soaked cheeks because of how heavy it is to carry.
Your choices seem pretty limited as this stone comes quickly towards you. Cover your face, or let it hit you strait on. Neither are preferable-- and I am here to tell you neither are required.

Why these are stupid, but needed.

Before I go any further, I think it is important to address why we even have these sticks and stones. (I will primarily just be using the example of stones, because honesty, sticks aren't that great of an analogy. Sorry, sticks.) A few common stones come to mind as I write this: Depression, broken family, physical or mental disabilities, abuse (sexual, physical, mental), poverty, addictions, neglect, psychological disorders- if you can name it, it probably counts. I cannot answer the question as to why we have them, but I can say why we need them.
I am a God-fearing Christian, that wholeheartedly believes in a bigger plan. I know God has a reason for putting me here- in this place, with these people and these trials. And I know it takes a lot of courage to look at the mess we call "life" and say thank you, I needed this. But when you think about it, that is all we can do. What better way to create a smooth, polished carving than with sand paper? What better way to smooth out a jagged stone, than thousands of years of water and waves? What better way to harden a beautiful clay sculpture, than a staggeringly hot kiln? The people we want to be like-- that we look up to and admire-- were built by their trials. To have a trial-free life is to have a pointless life. Anything worth striving towards can be achieved through the growth and knowledge gained from trials.

Why we are letting ourselves get hurt.

I am probably preaching to the choir here, so I will get to the point. Don't be a victim. We all have these trials and we all know they suck. If you look throughout history, people idolize those who had sore trials and were able to overcome and become better because of it. So why not you? Were they any less human than yourself? Weren't they just ordinary people trying their best? What makes you any different? What excuse are you riding on, that is keeping you from being just as successful as they were?
There is something called a Victim Mentality. It is the idea that you are subject to the will of whatever is being inflicted upon you. It is the idea that you are powerless, and have no means of making your situation better. let me tell you a hard truth: THAT IS NEVER THE CASE.  Never, in the history of the world, has there been a situation where someone was completely powerless to make it better.
Dr Viktor E Frankl was a Psychologist, Neurologist, Holocaust survivor, and author of the book Man's Search For Meaning. In his book he says: "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms -- to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.” We all have agency, if we like it or not. It is our choice if these stones overcome us, no matter how difficult.

Don't beg for pain!

Now please, please do not think I am being naive in saying what I have. I do not claim any expertise on this subject- I am only saying what I have learned from my own trials. No, I don't know what depression feels like. I have never been starving, in a war zone, or had cancer. The only bone I've broken is my nose, and it was completely accidental. I've never had a baby, shot someone, or been paralyzed. I have not had some of the experiences that so many people have had. But I have felt pain. I have been hurt, betrayed, made fun of. I've had bad days, where all you can do is cry and hope sleep comes fast. I have seen loved ones suffer and fight just to be happy each day. I have feared for my life. I may not know what true pain is, but I do know one thing: we are always in control.
Yes, you were wronged. You didn't deserve it! You don't want it! But it's still here. And sometimes you need to put on your big boy pants and just. keep. walking. Playing the victim-- having the mindset that you are powerless and weak and trapped-- is only asking for more pain. It's as if you were the one giving the stones to the throwers, saying "Hit me again! That's all I get anyways."

"With my luck.."

Oh how I hate this saying! This embodies the very mindset that I am tying so strongly to advise you against. The idea that you are destined to have bad things happen to you, simply because you have been wronged before. Do you realize you are creating the very thing you are complaining about? Negative thoughts bring negative results. If you tell yourself over and over that you will be hurt, then you will be hurt. You are telling yourself and everyone around you that you don't deserve any better. How do you expect the rest of the world to react to that? And more importantly, how do you think God feels about that? Having His most precious and valued creation be called weak, powerless, and worth only pain and misery? Can you imagine the pain He feels every time you self-shame, beat yourself down, or think negative thoughts about yourself? Every time you allow yourself to be the victim, you are telling God "I won't let you help me, because I am not worth it." Every time you play the victim, you collect stones to give to your enemies. You are asking, begging to be hurt again, which creates a never-ending cycle of pain.

We need to stop babying ourselves and cradling our wounds. We are far more powerful than we could ever imagine, and with God's help there is not a single trial we cannot overcome. We are not our circumstances, and the sooner we learn this the better. There is a big 'ol world out there just waiting to be discovered. There are people out there waiting to be touched by your courage and strength, as you have been by others before you. Don't let them down. Don't let yourself down. There is enough chocolate in this world to keep you going, I promise.

Are We Playing God?

This song:
To better understand what I will be saying, I suggest listening to it before you read on.

http://grooveshark.com/#!/s/Playing+God/3Vy7Zz?src=5

Did you do it? Good. Now a disclaimer.

*Disclaimer: Everything I say here is labeled as my opinion and interpretation. I reserve all rights to say things that someone somewhere might maybe find offensive. If you are that person, you should learn how to not get so offended because I am seriously not saying anything really offensive in this post. I do not claim the same for other posts though.*

So sad that I have to add those so often.... Anyways!

The song of topic today is Playing God by Paramore. I am going ot be speaking less of the actual song, and more of what would create the ideas in it. I am an avid Paramore fan- I own two Paramore tees and have many of their albums on my ipod. And yet, it hasn't hit me until today what this song could mean.

"If God's the game that you're playing, well we must get more acquainted. because it has to be so lonely, to be the only one who's holy."

What I see in this song is what the entire world sees Christianity as being: Someone bossing people around, telling them they are condemned to Hell if they are sinners. But the thing is, it wasn't the world that created this idea- it was us. The world could not create a snobby, condemning stereotype of Christians if there wasn't some truth. With this in mind I want to point out I am speaking of (and to) Christians in general.
I personally claim the denomination of Christian. And, being Christian, I see from the inside what a terrible image we can give if we are not careful. We must understand that EVERYTHING we do reflects on Christians in general. We are representatives of Christ and sharers of His message. That is our calling as His people. This shows the importance of following His example- because if we are not, people still see us. They know what we are supposed to represent, they know who we stand for, they know how we are supposed to act. And the moment you or I step away from that ideal lifestyle and act as we shouldn't, we become the kinds of people that we try so hard to avoid being. 

"You don't have to believe me, but the way I, way I see it- next time you point a finger I might have to bend it back and break it, break it off. Next time you point a finger, I'll point you to the mirror."

What is covered specifically in this song is unrighteous judging. As the Pharisees of the New Testament, we- the people of Christ who are supposed to represent him- can (if we are not careful) become just as condemned as the prostitutes and murderers by judging others as lower than ourselves. This is a sin that sneaks up and grasps even the most worthy of us, and one that we need to be actively aware of. It's one of those sins that don't really feel like a sin as they are happening.

A quote from Dallin H Oaks, an apostle for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, explains this far better than I could.
"I have been puzzled that some scriptures command us not to judge and others instruct us that we should judge and even tell us how to do it. I am convinced that these seemingly contradictory directions are consistent when we view them with the perspective of eternity. The key is to understand that there are two kinds of judging: Final Judgments, which are forbidden to make, and Intermediate Judgements, which we are directed to make, but upon righteous principles." (CES Fireside, Mar. 1 1998)

Final judgements are things that are very important to make. Things like: Am I on the right track to where I need to be? Are the people in my life helping me achieve what I want? Should I marry this person? We were put here on earth to choose, be tested and learn what is right and wrong. Being able to think critically and judge things as they are is an important part of that.
On the other hand, Intermediate judgements are some of the most dangerous things a person can do. They keep you from thinking clearly, keep you from opportunities to grow and possibly help others, and put you in a "throne" of self-justifying and high importance. It is the opposite of what Christ has asked us to do- Love others and love Him. If you love Him, you keep his commandments. Things like: That person is dressed a certain way, they must be a terrible person. You are so young and unaccomplished- who are you to talk to me? I can't believe this person did this one thing, they are so over-confident!

"It's just my humble opinion, but it's one that I believe in. You don't deserve a point of view, if the only thing you see is you."

To interpret this into my own language, I have made a sort of a template: When and when not to judge. This is what works for me personally, so if it doesn't for you feel free to create your own, or you could become a mass murderer (that is always an option).

Times to judge: 
Judge what to do in a situation
Judge if you can do business with a person (trustworthiness)
Judge if you are capable to follow through with a decision
Judge what is safe and what is stupid
Judge people only to the point of determining safety or other important things (Can I trust my neighbor to watch my kids?) (Are these friends a good influence on me?)

Times NOT to judge:
Do not judge others on their past
Do not judge others on who they affiliate with
Do not judge others opinions or feelings
Do not judge those you do not know or understand
DO not judge those you do know and understand
DO not judge pretty much anyone, unless it puts you or others in jeopardy in some way

When you think about it, it is God's job to judge. He has all the leverage, he created us and gave us literally everything. So who are we to think we have that right?

The challenge I have for you is this:
Ask yourself, Am I playing God? Am I putting on myself a responsibility I have no right to?


** I wrote this essay with the intention of opening people's eyes, and have found it was probably more for me than anyone else. I hope you all get as much out of it as I did. I have a lot of work to do in this aspect and hope that we can all grow and develop together to become more Christian- more worthy of Christ's name upon us**

The Power of Being Powerless

Pushy.
Sensitive.
Stubborn.
Hiding.
Emotional.
Impatient.
Slow.
Rude.
Worrying.
Lazy.
Untalented.

Any of these sound familiar? Many a name has been thrown at me, many weaknesses brought into the light from their cowering corner.
And yet. Does it even matter?

I say it does.

I believe that many weaknesses are strengths in disguise. or more accurately, strengths in a premature stage. It might help to look at each of these words first:

Pushy. - you know what you want and aren't afraid to go for it.
Sensitive. - You empathise easily and connect with people on a personal level.
Stubborn. - You stand your ground and are immovable in your beliefs.
Hiding. - You know your place and don't dump your emotions on everyone else.
Emotional. - you have a big heart and love very deeply and purely.
Impatient. - you are eager and enthusiastic.
Slow. - you find importance in little things and don't let the world put you in a rush.
Rude. - you are willing to say the truth when no one else will.
Worrying. - you have an open heart and care deeply for others.
Lazy. - you are relaxed and not high-strung, you know how to have fun and enjoy life.
Untalented. - you are adaptable and light, you aren't defined by one thing.

It's a bit different looking at these words as compliments instead of insults. I believe that every negative 'characteristic' is simply a strength that hasn't grown up yet. We need Christ and His Atonement to help these weaknesses mature to their full potential.

2 Corinthians 12:9 - And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

It is such a relief that it isn't completely our job- we are powerless. We cannot change these premature weaknesses into strengths without God's eternal love to nourish it. And we can only use this power if we are able to admit we are powerless. Very natural how that works- the more we realize we are powerless, the more power we are given.
With God on our side, we need not fear any name thrown our way, rather we will welcome them. They are gifts- helping us find our little strength seeds that just need a little love to grow.

Book review: The Great Divorce by C S Lewis

*Disclaimer* This was originally a book report for english credit, so if it sounds like a book report, it's a book report. This will make it sound slightly naive, so bear with me.

“The sane would do no good if they made themselves mad to help madmen.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce

The Great Divorce by C S Lewis is a fiction / theological fantasy novel. It has become one of my favorite religious books so far. I highly respect the author and all of his works that I have read. It was published in 1944 in a newspaper, and soon after in book form.
The basic storyline of this book: a man has just died and is taking a bus to the afterlife. He meets many interesting people on the bus, but settles with talking to a very smart man who thinks he knows everything. When he arrives, they are in a dark street with lots of barren houses. Over the course of many conversations, observations, and experiences, the man finds out that this is “hell”, or just where everyone else goes. It consists of endless houses. This is because people would build houses, and then start fighting with neighbors. They would then move outward and build a new house, so on and so forth for thousands of years until you can't find an end to the houses.
The man then got on another bus that was taking them up to a field. Or he thought it was up. It is later explained that he was not going up- he was growing. The “hell” or dark town was actually microscopic, with the real world being much larger. Once they arrived, many were unable to leave the bus because the ‘reality’ was completely solid while they were still ghost like, meaning that the grass cut through their feet and the rain was like bullets, tearing through them. I quote I like from this section of the book: “reality is harsh to the feet of shadows.”
Many people started coming from the mountains- great, glorious people that were glowing and perfectly solid. Many had robes, and many had no clothing at all. All were young and healthy powerful, to the point that many ghosts couldn’t even be near them. These people came and tried to invite the ghost people to join them up in the mountain. They told them that the more they accepted it, the closer they got to the mountain, the more solid they became and the less it hurt to walk. But it took them choosing to go, the people could not force them. The rest of the book consists of many different stories of people being invited, chastened or coaxed towards this “heaven”. He then wakes up, and realizes the whole thing was a dream.
I found this book very inspirational because of the truth I found in it. I can pull so many quotes that I have written down from these pages that spoke to me. There were many times where it was almost a slap in the face. For example, there was a ghost woman talking to a solid man (whom she had obviously known in their earthly life) about her son, who was up in the mountains. After a long conversation, and her excessive begging to see her son, it was concluded that she loved her son too much. You wouldn't see that as a sin, but the problem was that she ‘loved’ him so much that she truly didn't love him at all- she loved the idea of him, the fact that she cared for him. She loved being in charge of someone, being their only source of refuge, saying that he was HER son. In her pleadings, she said many things like “he needs me”, “let me take care of him”, “he is MY son, how dare you keep him from me.” It was a very self-centered idea, to the point that it wasn’t love at all, it was pride.

The way Lewis puts everything together- the way he words things, and captures your attention- made it almost impossible to put down. I highly suggest reading this book.

Healthy recipes: Baked oatmeal to go!

Baked Oatmeal To Go

Ingredients
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups applesauce, unsweetened
1 banana, mashed
6 packets of Sweetleaf Stevia or 1½ teaspoons stevia powder or use ½ cup honey
5 cups, Old Fashioned rolled oats {Bob’s Red Mill}
¼ cup flaxseed meal
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
3 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
2¾ cups milk
Optional toppings: raisins, walnuts, chocolate chips

Instructions
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Mix eggs, vanilla, applesauce, banana and Stevia together in a bowl.
Add in oats, flax, cinnamon, baking powder, salt and mix well with wet ingredients.
Finally pour in milk and combine.
Spray a 12 and 6 capacity muffin tin with cooking spray or use cupcake liners. Pour mixture evenly into muffin tin cups.
If using toppings add them onto the tops of muffins now. If using fresh or frozen fruit, drop it right into the batter.
Bake 30 minutes until a toothpick in center comes out clean.
Cool and enjoy or freeze them in gallon freezer bags.

Nutrition Info (without toppings)

Servings: 18* Calories for one: 143* Fat: 4g* Cholesterol: 25mg* Sodium: 161mg* Fiber: 4g* Sugars: 4g* Carbs: 23g* Protein: 6g*

**Gluten Free & Diabetic Friendly** Recipe Source: SugarFreeMom.com

A very important decision: Dieting Isn't For Me

You all know how I am- fun, happy, terribly attractive *cocky hair flip*. But in all seriousness, I am generally pretty confident in myself. And yet, probably from a combination of being a teenage girl and negative whispers in my ears, I have a tendency to get down on myself. I am very analytical (lots of people think I just judge everyone.. Sorry if I give that impression) but just as much as a judge others, I judge myself tenfold. And guess where I can find the most ammo? You guessed it! My physical appearance.
Now I'm not saying it is unnatural or wrong to be aware of how you look and appear. I find it a useful tool to express yourself and present yourself according to what you are trying to say. What I have a problem with is what I call 'self-dieting' or dieting because you are self conscious of how you look. Let me explain my experience.

I have always been self concious of my appearance. I was very skinny and athletic until about 11 years old, where from the beginning of the summer to the end, I had grown a few pants sizes. now it wasn't because of bad eating habits (though I do NOT claim to have good ones). It was puberty kicking in. All of a sudden- I had hips! I wasn't as flexible, I didn't have as much energy, and I was constantly begging for new clothes because I had grown out of the ones I got the month before. This is a pretty common story. Almost every girl has to deal with something like this- but I didn't know that. I felt very alone and scared with this new adaptation.
Throughout the years I have gotten a handle of things. I now understand the natural process of things like this. And yet.

As you get older, the push to diet and eat strictly healthy is almost deffining. You see the women with perfect 6-day exercise routines, strictly meager meals, and flat bellies. This is who you need to be, they say. Put down that icecream cone- don't you dare pick up those fries! We've got some apples, green paste and a few chia seeds to stuff down your throat instead!

So, I tried my best. I would turn down all treats, drink smoothies and eat carrots, and feel completely miserable. I would spend most days so overwhelmed by how bad my habits were and trying so hard to fix them, that I would end the day with a ball of cookie dough and a bad attitude. This is when I realized that dieting wasn't for me.

I do not criticise those who DO eat strictly healthy. I applaud you, actually. You are doing a great thing for yourself and if you feel that is what you need, don't let me say you're wrong. What I don't like is the constant pressure from society saying you have to be a pro-dieter or you aren't trying hard enough, you aren't healthy, you aren't taking care of yourself and you aren't beautiful. The fact that everyone is built differently doesn't even show up in the equation!

Everyone is different. Some flourish in the diet setting- I am not one of those people.

My solution: Be healthy.

I have decided today. I will enjoy food. It is worth being enjoyed, isn't it? But I will be aware of what I am putting in and make sure I am getting the nutrients I need. I will not exercise- but I WILL do something active that I love. A few of my favorites are dance, ice skate, and swim. I will be more aware of when I eat, so as to avoid storing unnecessary calories.

Basically, I will be happy.

I will be posting good, healthy recipes as much as I can on this blog, to help further the cause of healthy, happy living. Because- well- you are worth it. :)